Sunday, November 2, 2008

*UPDATED* Going Solo??

I am so silly.....

I RSVP'd for the birthday party & asked the mom to call me, so I'd have an idea what the birthday party would be like. She didn't. So, I pawned off Jami on my parents for the afternoon & Lindsi & I set out. I was of the mind that I was going to stay, since most everyone I talked to said, if it were me, I'd stay.

(Side note...growing up, I don't remember EVER going to a birthday party or BEING at a birthday party where parents stayed, starting around age 5. Really underscores the different world we live in today).

So, we get there & it is like Family Fest in the backyard. Birthday Invitees & siblings are running around the yard, jumping on the trampoline & bobbing for apples. The moms are all gathered together at a pool side table eating fresh shrimp & other yummy appetizers, drinking diet cokes.

I have to admit, I'm in Culture Shock this year with Lindsi's class. Last year, for kindergarten, we had a great experience. The teacher was kind, loving, & encouraging. But, the class was very easy academically. The teacher did not encourage volunteers, because most of the students had parents who could not or would not volunteer & she did not think it fair if the same two or three parents showed up for everything. Very low socio economic class & parental involvement.

This year, Lindsi vaulted to the top 1st grade class. Most of these kids moved as a unit from the top kindergarten class. I think only 2 of us have "the new" kids. These are the parents with SAHMs, the parents who are at the school 3, 4 even 5 days a week, helping in classrooms, library, reading labs. They know every child and all of the teachers by first name. I feel a little like a circle trying to fit into a square hole.

One of the moms befriended me early on, she already knew & liked Lindsi. She's bubbly & friendly & knows everybody. We arrived at the same time, so she took me over & introduced me to the other moms.....(2 others at the table happen to be Debbies)...

First it was the general concensus that it was so wonderful that their kids were being exposed to sign language (Lindsi has use of an interpreter)...ect...
Then one mom asked if Lindsi was born deaf & I told her I really wasn't sure. Someone else piped up about newborn hearing screenings...how could I not know? Didn't she have one??

I told them, that Lindsi was adopted.....one mom on the edge of the conversation turned around...ADOPTED??? Which child in the class is ADOPTED??? Well, Lindsi is adopted, from China...OHH.........
Then, the mom I know the best, (I think to move the conversation along) said...and she has her sister!!!!! AMAZING!!! What are the chances that you could go back & get her sister??? I think it is so INCREDIBLE!!! To which I felt I had to say, well, they are sisters now, but they are not biologically related.....!
Another round of WHAT??!! But, they look so much alike!!
That was all in the first 5 minutes of sitting down.

I never offered up that I'm a single mom...=) I'm sure that hasn't occurred to anyone. I felt like we are already the talk of the class, without adding that little bonus tid bit. To be clear, everyone is nice, the kids all great, we just have so little in common with them. I have been around too many adoptive families as our social network & I guess I had not really been around people so out of touch about adoption before this.

They were all talking about what teacher the "class" will likely get next year. I'm not even certain we will be in "The Class" next year. I think we really belong somewhere between the two....for all kinds of reasons.......=)

1 comment:

Lost and Found said...

OMG you're single??????